Learning and Growing...

After a While

After a while you learn

The subtle difference between

Holding a hand and chaining a soul

And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning

And company doesn't always mean security.

And you begin to learn

That kisses aren't contracts

And presents aren't promises

And you begin to accept your defeats

With your head up and your eyes ahead

With the grace of a woman

Not the grief of a child

And you learn

To build all your roads on today

Because tomorrow's ground is

Too uncertain for plans

And futures have a way

Of falling down in mid flight

After a while you learn

That even sunshine burns if you get too much

So you plant your own garden

And decorate your own soul

Instead of waiting

For someone to bring you flowers

And you learn

That you really can endure

That you are really strong

And you really do have worth

And you learn and you learn

With every good bye you learn

Veronica A. Shoffstall

Life has so much to teach us. Open your heart and learn all there is to learn about life, love, yourself, your friends, family, neighbours, community, country, the world ...

Despite all the pain and sorrow in life, and in the the world, there is so much beauty, so much joy, so much hope. So much to learn and understand, and accept. Even though we don't always understand, and even though there isn't always an answer, we can learn and grow through all experiences life has to offer - good and bad. Sometimes we choose to close our eyes and our heart and soul, and we shut ourselves away, refusing to take more risks, afraid of yet more pain... but in doing this, we miss out on fully experiencing the good times too...

Believe that you are strong. You have the courage to endure the darkest times, and to emerge with courage, faith and hope...

“In the darkest hour the soul is replenished and given strength to continue and endure.”

(unknown author)

Aspirations ...

Thought for today:

Far away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see the beauty, believe in them and try to follow where they lead...

~ Louisa May Alcott

I love this quote, and I love the fact that she is aware that she might not reach her aspirations, but it is enough to be able to see them and believe in them...

What are your aspirations?

Can you visualise them?

Do you believe in them?

What do you need to do to achieve them?

Open your arms to change ....

Instructions for Life

(Dali Lama)

Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
Follow the three ‘R’s.
Respect for self, Respect for others, and Responsibility for all your actions.
Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
When you realise you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
Spend some time alone every day.
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Live a good, honourable life.
Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.
A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation.
Don't bring up the past.
Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
Be gentle with the earth.
Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

Soothed by the Sea ...

The sea was bright turquoise and topped in the purest white, sparkling in the sun.

A chilly wind blew white blobs, like shaving foam, across the crests of the waves.

I stood gazing out across the ocean, as far as I could see.

After a while, I felt a sense of peace replacing the anguish.

I shoved my hands deep down into my pockets and grasped my pieces of crystal security blanket, turned and walked away, with a hint of a spring in my step; restored by nature once again...

For whatever we lose (like a you or a me),

It's always our self we find in the sea.

e.e. cummings

Why do we love the sea?

It is because it has some potent power to make us think things we like to think.

Robert Henri

zen-like patience and a few haikus

I sat for ages on my garden seat this morning, notebook in hand, ready to write down a flow of inspirational words of inner wisdom ... It isn’t often that I consciously make time to do this; more often than not it’s a case of a few snatched moments here and there, where I hurriedly scribble down the odd flash of inspiration that suddenly strikes me at unexpected moments ...

I sat and waited ... and waited ... and waited ... but my mind was blank – no words were springing to mind. This was a bit disappointing, as I’d really wanted to let the words flow out of my heart and soul, so I felt a bit miffed that I just couldn’t connect with my reserves of inner guidance...

After a while, I smiled at myself. It dawned on me that this sort of thing can’t be forced... the beauty of my inner voice is that it speaks to me when it is ready, rather than because I’ve scheduled a specific time to connect with it ... Usually the words come to me when I least expect to hear them, so that fact that I’d tried to arrange a ‘meeting’ on my terms meant that it was never going to be very productive.

My inner voice can’t be forced to talk when I decide I want to hear it – it doesn’t work like that. It decides to speak when I don’t really expect it to – although the more I listen, the more I get ‘tuned in’ to when it’s likely to make itself heard – whether it’s while I’m washing dishes at the kitchen sink, sorting out the washing, or standing in a queue at the supermarket. That’s why I’ve started carrying a pen and paper with me wherever I go...

So, instead of connecting with my innermost thoughts and feelings, I sat zen-like and patient and emptied my mind and simply absorbed what was going on around me... After a while, I started writing, but rather than it being about what my inner voice was telling me, it was about what I was observing around me, in nature... in the form of zen-like haikus... I love haikus – they capture the moment so succinctly. I hope that one day I will have a book of my haikus published, but in the meantime, here are some I‘ve written today, and earlier in the week...

Daffodils nodding
A dancing yellow river
Swaying in the wind

An apricot glow
Reaches out across the sky
A new day begins

Ripples on the pond
Sparkle just for a moment
In the morning sun

Crying in alarm
The blackbird warns of danger
And then all is calm

A visiting crow
Waddles down the garden path
he's making me laugh

Your inner voice, your instinct, knows everything. If you listen to what you know instinctively, it will always lead you down the right path.
Henry Winkler

Have you taken some time out this week to sit peacefully and empty your mind, and / or connect with your inner voice?

Courage

I’ve been thinking about courage this morning ... What exactly is ‘courage’? Courage is ‘the ability to confront fear, pain [and] uncertainty ’ is a definition on wikipedia...

Courage is something I’ve needed a lot of over the last few weeks, and some days it seems to be pulsating through me, like lifeblood, whereas on other days it’s a tiny little whisper hidden away somewhere deep inside me and it needs to be gently coaxed out ...

‘Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow’ (Mary Anne Radmacher). I love this quote – it was something I really needed to gently remind myself when I was having a really tough day a few weeks back. Also, ‘courage is being afraid but going on anyhow’ ( Dan Rather)...

To me, courage is what gets me through the toughest times. It’s the inner flame that guides me on even in the darkest hour, but sometimes the flame is tiny and faltering, or it goes out altogether, whereas sometimes it’s blazing like a beacon, confidently leading me forward.

Courage is to take a step forward even though the way ahead is uncertain... And, let’s face it, nothing in life is certain except death ... but even then, there is so much uncertainty about death... it is the end of one phase of life, but maybe it marks the beginning of something new... But let’s not dwell too much on death. Living is what matters right now...

‘Sometimes even to live is an act of courage’ ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca.

Sometimes, just living one moment at a time, taking one step at a time, takes so much courage it almost seems impossible, yet at other times, it seems effortless to glide forward in leaps and bounds ... but it is in those times where it takes all the courage we can muster to get through each moment, that we really learn and grow... and we become stronger and more resilient ... Like the oak tree that lasts for hundreds of years, it takes time to grow steadily and slowly, and to endure life’s storms...

... Anyway, I’d better draw this blog to a close, because at the mention of trees my mind is wandering onto the topic of gardening, and I’m wishing I’d gone along to my allotment now! Never mind ... it’s been therapeutic to have a morning of being at home with my cats, doing some inner-reflecting and generally loafing around...

Here’s a poem I came across earlier:


IT GIVES MY SOUL COURAGE
it gives my soul courage
to know the impossible
is achievable
and i need
neither to be the strongest
nor the wisest
i need
only to be the best i can be
~lungelo mbatha


Finally, here’s an affirmation:
‘I have the courage to keep going.’

What are your thoughts on courage?
How courageous are you feeling right now?
What inner resources do you draw on to get you through the bad times?

I heal...

I wrote this a few months after my mum died, and the words still ring true today ... I posted it on my other blog a few years ago, so I apologise if you've already seen it! ...

A Few Snatched Moments

Sitting outside
All is calm
I am at peace
Life feels good
Life goes on
Time heals
Nature heals
I heal
Step by step
I heal.

A Brown

Sunday Soul Searching ...

Hello, it's been a long time since I've updated my blog...

A recent sudden bereavement has prompted me to start writing again - writing, gardening and yoga (along with my amazing daughter) are what got me through the loss of my mum five years ago, and now that I'm going through another terrible loss, I'm making sure to throw myself into what I know I need to do - writing and gardening again, although I'm replacing yoga with walking this time around, but meditation and reiki self-treatments are a big help too...

This is what I wrote earlier:

Sunday morning, 21st March 2010

... I'm at the allotment in the lovely warm sunshine, listening to Sufjan Stevens and cheerful birdsong.

It's such a beautiful day.The sky is so blue.

A lovely plump bumble bee has just flown round me in a circle...I saw my first ladybird of the year today. I disturbed him underneath some foxglove leaves.Daffodils are open in the sunshine; yellow and cheerful...

I'm amazed that the woman a few plots down is finding pleasure in moaning loudly about everyone and everything. Why can't she be quiet for a moment and open her eyes to the beauty that is all around us?

Despite all the pain and sorrow in life, there are moments of real, astounding beauty and harmony - these moments are so startling and so precious, and I feel so blessed that despite the sadness I am enveloped in, I am still open to the love, hope, beauty and light that is always present, even in the darkest hour...

Without the darkness, how would we be able to see the light?

I am open to all the expereiences life has to offer me - good and bad. There is so much to learn, through the laughter and tears ... but most of what I learn comes to me in these moments of clarity; in the stillness and solitude ... that is why I find myself withdrawing at times ... it's because I need times of solitude in which to learn and grow and discover more about myself, about life, death, and so much more ...

And with this awareness, I find peace; steadily rising up from somewhere deep within me...
Peace, and the strength and courage to keep on going... to keep going forward, step by step, day by day ...

We all need to find our own way forward... If you are going through tough times at the moment, take some time to really listen to your inner voice inside ... let it guide you forward in a way that is appropriate for you... trust yourself ... you know what you need to do right now..